The final verdict from the doc

Well, today was my visit with the orthopaedic doc. to find out the official diagnosis after reading the MRI. I don't like to do things poorly. And not wanting to be inconsistent, I have injured my knee painstakingly thoroughly.

Officially, I have a Grade 3 tear of the MCL which require 4-6 weeks of pre-hab Physical therapy to heal, as well as to build the quad muscle. A completely torn ACL, which will require reconstructive surgery at any time after the MCL has healed. Re hab will begin immediately after surgery with walking w/ brace at about 2 weeks, jogging in a straight line at about 3 months and maximum performance at about 6 months. A sprained LCL, that will likely heal on its own.

So basicly, the only thing holding my knee together right now, is my knee brace. It seems that the knee brace, myself, and my new physical therapist, Ryan, that I will meet on Monday, will be almost inseperable for the most of 2011.

I haven't really been able to fully comprehend it all yet. I don't want to do it. But I know I have to do it. I know people have much, much, MUCH more serious injuries than this. I know that God is with me, and He is my strength. I know that I really wish that Race were home. I have a million thoughts going through my head right now. I have to rearrange everything. School, the kids activities, our activities here at home. It all has to be re-worked, so that we can manage all of this for the next6-7 months. I know it can be done...........I'm just still sorting it all out.

But I will tell you the worst of it all. The worst thing is the absolute vulnerability that I feel. I have been living this life without my husband for long periods of time, ever since the kids were little. I have always felt that I could handle, in one way or another, most anything that would come along. For the first time, I really don't feel that way. I mean right now, uneven ground is kicking my butt!

Ah! But I will get it sorted out. And I know in my heart of hearts that God has something for me. Something to show me...Something to work out in me......a blessing to come by relying on His grace. I know this. And I will wrestle with it a bit, and then get on with it. Because as I was reminded this morning, "Amazing Love! How can it be? That you, my King would die for me?"

THAT is the source of my strength.

Cheers!

melissa