my name is melissa and i have a problem

So. I got this ad in the mail today.

Sweet, sweet shoe god. What are you trying to do to me?
Now, a couple of the booties on the left headlight caught my eye, and mind you I would love to have them. But the pair that stopped me cold in my tracks, made my palms sweat, and realize that I simply could.not.live.another.happy.day.without the knowledge that these shoes were on their way to my closet, was the breathtaking boot on the RIGHT headlight.

Meet the Oro Nero "angie" from Piperlime.
Theyre not black. They're brown.
Oh.My.GOSH.
My trembling fingers quickly dropped the ad and tapped out the email address where my lovely fall boots awaited. I quickly found them, and hit "select". Then they drop in your virtual shopping cart and you checkout, right???

No. No my friends. That is not what happened. A new screen appeared that read something like, "Yes, we loved these too, we just weren't able to keep them in stock. Have a look at our other shoes and maybe you'll find a new favorite".

wait a minute. what?

Then I hit the back button several times and tried repeatedly, thinking that this was some sort of glitch. Some sort of computer error. Some sort of damned sick joke!

Quickly I " googled" the name of the boots.

nothing. Only at THIS store can you get these shoes.
what???

Ah-HA! EBAY!
My fingers flew...

nothing. .............On EBAY!!!!

What the h_ll??? BUT-but-but...I JUST GOT THE AD!!!!!!!!!!
Good God People! This is AMERICA!! The country of immediate gratification. Of over-the-top materialism. And you're tellin' me that I can't HAVE these boots??? These wonderful, buttery soft, look- good- with- anything- boots??

My ONE FALL SHOE PURCHASE! And you're tell'n me I CAN"T get them???

Is this what life would be like with Obama as president?

Seriously. I was crushed. and angry. How dare Piperlime send me an ad on an out-of-stock beautiful boot. I had already envisioned myself wearing them. I could just see myself clicking down the isles of Food Lion, pushing my little cart. (Silence! It's where I hang. Don't laugh. I live in the country.)
My mind began to trail. I was losing it. I could envision myself handing a large wad of cash to some immigrant somewhere, with his grateful family behind him, as he handed me the boots. (O.K, this was a little off seeing as how these were made in Germany.....but you can see my utter desperation.)

So I sent Piperlime and email. I asked if these shoes would be available again. As of this evening I had not received a reply.

I began to think of the OTHER people who had already PURCHASED the boots. (You know BEFORE they were out of stock.) Ha! Lock your doors tonight people.Lock your doors.

I thought of seeing them on someone. On a friend, even. "So....where'd you get THOSE stupid boots?" I'd say.
" Oh yeah?.......Well....they're stupid."

Tonight, I wanted to show Savannah the boots. She doesn't REALLY care, but she pretends that she does. And then I pretend I "get"art. It all works out, really. I went to piperlime again. And there they were.

BACK IN STOCK. (chorus of angels singing)

Piperlime has a ROCKIN' customer service department!

ALL HAIL THE GREAT SHOE MECCA THAT IS PIPERLIME!!!

Don't judge me.

Look at them again.

Cheers!

Melissa

And now, back to our regularly scheduled blog....

The birthday has come and gone and the lobster shells and wine glasses all cleared away. Things are back to the usual.

On Saturday I wallpapered the room upstairs for Savannah. It's the remaining part of our upstairs and it will be used as Savannah's art room/TV room. I started at 8:30 am and ended some time between 4 and 5. It was totally worth ruining my new manicure. It looks SO good!! We did a textured paper, which I had never worked with before. We are both really pleased with the results. We'll try to get pictures taken today to show you. (And besides, my toes still look nice.)

On Sunday, after church the boys went to a friends house while Savannah worked on a few art projects for her room, and I did lesson plans for the coming week. I realized that we were already starting our 5th week of school! I can't believe it. And you know, I am really pleased with the way things are going this year. I feel more together and organized than last. I think that it is partly due to paring down everyones activities. We were TOO BUSY last year! So it feels good to slow down a bit and let things sink in. You know....take a look around every once in awhile and realize.......it's GOOD. ;-)

I'm still working out 4 times a week. And this week, I need to go up weight in everything. Meaning the amount of weight that I am squatting, curling, whatever.....needs to INCREASE. I have come so far with this from where I started off that I totally psych myself out when I have to go up weight. I look at the size of the weight that I am doing.....the thing that was SO hard, and is now DOABLE, and I look at the size that I would jump up to, and I think "There's NO WAY. There is NO WAY I CAN DO THAT." ANd then I throw the weight on and I struggle through my reps and sets, and I realize. "Hey. I'm stronger than I thought. I think I might be able to do this!" SO. We'll see how it goes this week. It's the only way for me to keep any shape!


So, things have been a little slow around here. And when things are slow, and your kid has a video camera. You get videos on your computer like this one. Jackson and his friend, at the friends house, filming an infomercial. Admittedly, I am SO glad that there aren't any videos of MY commercials that *I* used to do at this age!! LOL!!





Cheers!
Melissa

The Birthday Lobster Fest

As promised, the pictures from my birthday. The Birthday Lobster Fest. Thanks to both of my sisters!!!
First. THE LIVE LOBSTERS!!!! This was an awesome thing in itself. I mean, you get a cooler of live lobsters!!! They were packed in there all cold laying on an ice pillow and snuggling with a big lemon and a container of butter. Whatever your plans WERE, you change them, cause baby you're cookin' lobster tonight!



We tried to make their last moments happy ones, so we played with them a little. However you were ALWAYS aware that should one of those rubber bands break off of those claws....you were in serious trouble. Herriott wasn't too sure about the whole process.*snort* Can't you just see one of those bands breaking right here????O.K, we played with them a lot.

At some point, you have to actually STOP playing with your lobster. And do the deed.
O.K., I'll admit it. The first one was a little hard.

I mean you have to plunge the guy (whom you were just photographed smiling with), head first into a vat of boiling water swirling with celery and carrots.
But you do it.
ANd you do it fast. And you slap the lid on and think "Wowthat'smean". And then you go and grab the next one. By the third, it's like nothin'. You're laughing and joking all ha! Ha! and merry-like. As if you are some old hardened dude off of "Deadliest Catch". Just call me "Sig"Then you pour a glass of wine, set the table, and have the kiddos put out the accompaniments and round up all the pliers in the house, because you have realized that you don't even OWN a nut cracker.

And then WALLAH!! You pull those suckers outta there, and they have magically transformed from your once good-time-playmate.........into..............FOOD!! WOO! HOO!!

And here ya go!!

Thomasina had Savannah take this picture.The colorful banner that you see in the background is a Happy Birthday banner that Jackson made for me.Nobody took a picture after we started eating, because....well ....we were eating succulent lobster and no one wanted to stop! The picture IS rather telling. Because, in fact, el vino did flow that evening. And by the time of Palin's speech we were on the sofa cheering wildly. LOL! Great end to a great day. We miss you Race!


Cheers!

Melissa

After I posted this, I realized how funny Jack's expression is in the last picture! There are SO many captions that could go above his head in a bubble! But, in fact it took Savannah several seconds to get the picture so, Thom was poised in mid-pour for a disturbing amount of time, which is why I am cracking up and Jack is staring open-mouthed!! Feel free to add your own captions in your comments!!!

Happy Birthday To ME!!

I am having a great day!!

First thing this morning, I got a call from the sexiest man in the whole Middle Eastern desert who was calling to wish me a Happy Birthday. This guy just happens to be my husband, the Amazing Race. It was so awesome to talk to him and see his face that for a moment I forgot that he is in the middle of a war zone.

The kids showered me with cards and birthday wishes. We finished school, and then just before I went out the Fed Ex guy delivered a LOBSTER GRAM to me, sent by Em and The Dude as a thank-you for watching the boys during their difficult time. What an AWESOME surprise!!! So, I went out, got my nails done and then stopped by the store for corn on the cob, new potatoes, and white wine. I called my sister and she is coming over to help me celebrate. We're cooking lobster tonight folks!! I'll have pictures tomorrow.

So, it's been a great day so far. Everyone has just been super nice to me! From Race, to the kids, to the family, to my best friend, to my cyber friends, to the nail tech, to the produce guy,(O.K., he's actually always nice), to the nice check-out boy who carded me for the wine and then said, "Have a nice birthday!"

Woo-HOO!! It's my last birthday of the 30's!! It's a night of family, lobsters, wine and some much anticipated political speeches!!
We'll have pictures tomorrow!
Cheers!
Melissa

Savannah's room make over

When I first painted, stenciled and wallpapered Savannah's room. She was 3. I remember that the week that the wallpaper was finished, Savannah woke up from her nap and found the stenciling paint crayon that I had forgotten to hide under lock and key. She promptly "stenciled" all over new wallpaper with the greasy, paint pencil. (Which in case you are wondering could only be removed with gasoline at the time. )
So, suffice it to say that at 14, she had outgrown her room a bit. Now, we don't have any super great pictures of the room, but you get the idea. It's a cape cod. And the room is actually pretty good sized, we just don't have any pics SHOWING that!! And the room was all carpet. SHe used to share the upstairs with another room across the hall that belonged to her brothers. We finished our basement and moved the boys down there. Then we knocked out the wall and she now has her own Great Room up there. I can't WAIT to get that finished. I'm AL-MOST done!
And now.....WALLAH!! Her "new" room. We paneled the wall with wainscoting panelling, painted the ceiling and upper walls a nuetral color, and then put laminate on the floor. The decor was all chosen by Savannah. She chose the colors and is still in the process of really "making it her own" with the usual posters and what-not.

Harriott loves the new rug.

The theme of the whole thing when finished is classic Rock n' Roll/ Hollywood. We have some pretty awesome wall stuff for all that. SO, maybe in a few weeks I'll be able to show off her Great Room!

IKEA

O.K, so I spent most of my Labor Day weekend on the road, but it was all SO worth it! Our closest IKEA store is about 3 hours away and the time had come to make a haul. So I piled up the kids, dumped the boys at my mom's, laid the seats flat in the suburban, and then Savannah and I drove to IKEA for furniture for her new bedroom. We came back with a bed, a nightstand, a gigantic mirror, several bookcases, and too many odds and ends to number.
All Saturday night and Sunday was spent with an allen wrench in my hand. I got all of the pieces put together and arranged in her room. It looks SO good!
Then today I drove BACK up to get the kids.
We are finally home. I will post a few before and after pictures later this evening. I LOVE IKEA!!!

The race is ON....

NOW we'll have an election race.........and I just hopped on board.
Cheers!
Melissa

Vintage Old West

O.K., so my camera is broken. BUT I DID get a new scanner and I just hate a blog with no pictures.





A while back, there was a story on AOL wondering what the heck possesses teens to think that having an Old West vintage photo of themselves would be a good thing??







And of course I have one.







So, HERE is my response to AOL:

Why Old West Vintage Photos are a good thing to have:


1.For the Quality, AUTHENTIC picture. WHo wouldn't be proud of that? Just look at that foaming beer my friend is holding. Along with all those empty bottles in the background. Pretty damned good for a shack at the fair don't you think?





2. To showcase the absolute awesomness of USED fishnet hose and feathers, coming together to make one slutty wild west outfit. YEE-HAW! Ahhhhhhh.......fishnet and feathers always adds a certain....something.

(Please, PLEASE dear God, do NOT allow my mind to wander to the place that we actually changed in. No. No. I musn't think about it..)

3.How about the chance to wear a hat to showcase one's perfect hair? Need I say more??
(My hair, of course, not my friends).



4. ANd most importantly, for the opportunity to take the photo home to one's parents, who will be simply stunned at the idiot decisions that their oldest offspring has begun to make.





I actually remember having this photo taken. Karen was my first friend to be able to drive. I remember the place where we had this taken, they just had this pile of stuff for you to choose from. I remember grabbing the cameo necklace and the garter before my friend and thinking "SCORE!" (Or whatever term I would have used then.) She didn't ask me to hang out with her much after that. Sorry Karen. Sorry for snatching the best slutty stuff before our photo, and sorry for showing this embarrassing photo to the world.

Do you have one of these?
Cheers!
Melissa

Study Hall is EXACTLY as I Remember it....

Oh- remember about the Co-Op school?
Well, I had to go and monitor study hall the other day for the first time. I had this awful scene in my head that included teenagers making out, and smoking joints, while I just sat there looking at my "In STYLE" mag and pretending not to see them.

I kept thinking to myself, "I mean SERIOUSLY...these are TEENS! How major of an infraction are these kids going to have to commit before *I* am going to call them on it???" I am just not into disciplining other peoples big kids, KWIM?

When I arrived, I found a lady who oozed TEACHER-ness. She was one of those ladies who was round-ish and her age was undeterminable ......somwhere between 35 and 50. ( You've seen people like that, right?) Her hair was brown-ish gray and cut in a no-fuss Peppermint Patty style, offset with black cat frame glasses.

I smiled and introduced myself. She replied, "Ohhhhhh......I see...she is DRESSED like a student....but she is a PARENT" Accompanied by a barely audible chuckle. SHe spoke these words as if there was someone else listening. But there wasn't.

(I was wearing jeans, a long, fitted "dressy tee" and flip flops.) wow. really pushin'the ole'envelope.

So, anyway, I am pretty sure that this was NOT meant as a compliment, but she doesn't know me vey well. Anytime anyone makes ANY reference to my appearing younger....? ......I take it as a HUGE compliment. I am seriously...BEAMING as I continue:

"Oh...! Well, THANK-YOU!!!!" I gushed, waving one hand over my heart. "You and I are just gonna be the BEST of friends, I know it!"

*blank stare*

Then it was just uncomfortable, so we got on with the study hall business.

As it turns out, there are these sofas and chairs in study hall, and there are classroom doors on each side, with classes going on behind them.

It was my job to keep everyone quiet.

I met some really nice moms and kids, and June Carter Cash was there, too.She was really sweet and much less serious after we broke the ice. I was chatting away, when one of the class doors opened and Mrs.Peppermint Patty stepped out and, in drill seargent fashion said, "O.K. you kids are talking TOO LOUD. I can hear you through this door!"
To which I had to look past all the unaware, ipod-wearing teens and sheepishly raise my hand and say, "Ohhhhhh...UM. That was actually ME talking. Not them. Yeah. that was me"
And then in a very small voice, "sorry."

"OH. It was you.", was the reply. And then she turned and dissapeared behind the classroom door.

I just gave a little silent shrug to the kids and then put my nose in the book that I brought.

So. Ya know. "Way to go, ME".

I will probably the first person "let go" from a volunteer position.

Oh well! Cheers!
Melissa

School's In

Em and The Dude broght Maisie back home today, so we are all hoping that they sink back in to the peaceful family existence that IS having 4 children under the age of 7. Thank you for your prayers.


SO. We are in our third week of school.

I love all things history/language arts.

I hate Algebra 2 and the swanky expensive TI-84 Plus Silver edition calculator that comes with it. (However, you can download software to send messages to other calculators! Thank goodness my 16 yr old is more mature than I am.)

Chinese is just plain scary. Couldn't they have just based their language on Latin like SOOooooo many other countries?? It would really make life a lot easier for me.(Again, son more mature than mother.)

*O.K., this was what I like and dislike. I'm really not sure about the kiddos*

Our female offspring continues to exhibit behaviors that point to a hospital-baby-switch at birth. She works so well independently, and finishes her work neatly and with little fanfare. She never drags her feet and always gives her best work. (sigh) She's a puzzle that one.

Youngest boy is still squirly. HOWEVER, if you keep the pace moving, he has become quite engaged. He has even been overheard muttering positive statements about school so far this year!


So that's it. It's actually going pretty well so far.In all seriousness, we have a good routine and we are liking our curricula. ANd most importantly...we're getting it all done! YAY! Oh- And Susan Wise Bauer??? Yeah. She knows that of which she speaks. I shall not stray again.
We are going to keep our heads down and be oh-so-studious until Race comes home and then we are taking a 2 week break.

I am missing him like crazy.

I told you that we were able to do the web cam thing this time, right? Well, the first time we spoke, I said, "Well..what do you think of being able to actually SEE each other while we talk now???" He got this big grin and said, "I don't know....but it sure makes my heart beat alot faster". AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I miss himImisshimImisshimImisshim!!!!!!!!!! (I know, I know...."get a room")

I take solace in eating right, working out 4-5 days aweek, and taking in medicinal amounts of good wine. Are you picturing a very fit gal wearing gym clothes, crying and drinking expensive wine straight from the bottle?

Good. Don't. I'm not that fit.


I have to tell you about study hall in another post. It's bizarre.

Cheers!
Melissa

Update

Please continue to keep Maisie, and Em's whole family in your prayers. They were supposed to come home with the baby today, but her fever went back up to 101 today, so they are still in the hospital. Please keep them in your prayers. Thank you SO much.

That's what family does....

Oh thank-you so much to those of you who thought to pray for my mom. She is feeling better. She was able to sleep well last night and is eating well. She seems to be getting her strength back a little more each day.

Emily and Todd welcomed their little bundle of joy into their family. ANd just as my mom has done for every single grandchild, she came and stayed with them for several days. My mom is great like that. She takes care of the other little people in the house, does laundry, cooks wonderful meals, and there is ALWAYS someone to hold the baby! And to prove how wonderful this time is, BOTH of her son-in-laws refer to these times as "vacation", and have always looked forward to it. She does it because she loves us. ANd that's what family does.

I think I told you that my folks were caring for a dear family friend (Uncle Roy) of ours who has pancreatic cancer and leukemia. Well when my mom got so sick, you can imagine what a toll this was on the whole situation there. Mom is the appointment maker, pill counter, nutritionist, housekeeper, secretary, dog walker(Uncle Roy also has a teeny little dog). My parents still have several businesses and a farm to run. So when mom gets sick, everything moves to a slow grind, as my dad does the best he can to keep up with it all and be a part time nurse on the side.

Thomasina closed up her studio and spent this past week at mom and dads, cooking, cleaning, and just doing all of the day to day tasks that must be done in a household when people are ill.
She went because she loves my mom, my dad, and my uncle Roy. And that's what family does.

Just days after the baby arrived at Em and Todd's house, they were hit with a wicked virus. It went through the kids. Then on to Todd. Then Emily. Leaving in it's wake fever ravaged bodies, and terrible aching limbs and muscles. They kept fighting. But, oh, these poor people!!!

And then it hit the baby.

Their doctor sent them straight to the hospital. They were emotionally and physically drained, and really fearing for their precious little baby girl.
So on Friday,we called off school, and the kids and I picked up their three boys, and they spent the weekend here with us. We enjoyed them so much. It was such a treat to have little guys back in our house! And we were hoping to give Em and Todd the time that they needed to recuperate, rest and regroup.

Because we love them. And that's what family does.

I know that Em will have so much more to write on all of this if things ever slow down a bit for them. Maisie seems to be in the clear and will hopefully be back home tomorrow.

All of this made me think about the blessings of family. I hope that I am instilling in my own children these life lessons. When push comes to shove, it's always "Family First". That's what family does.

And what a difference it makes. If you are blessed with a family like this, don't forget to thank them and be thankful FOR them.



Cheers!
Melissa

I am a terrible mother

Before I launch into my story about being a bad mom, please continue to pray for my mom, who is a saintly mom. She is still very ill. We love you mom. Get better!

So, tonight was orientation night at the homeschool co-op. I really didn't want to go. Austin is taking one class over there. I kept thinking about calling one of the "Team Leaders" and saying something like, "Alright Mary....(pulling out checkbook)...how much is it gonna cost me to UN-participate, here?"

Although I half way think that this approach actually DOES hold a lot of merit with these small schools, I chickened out and we were forced to go.

I finally decided on an outfit to wear to this function(Don't laugh. I mean think about it...it's a tough crowd): fun orange top with smart wide legged denim trousers and snappy wedges. THIS outfit said, (in low, serious tone)"I am serious about my son's education".

I don't know what happened.After we arrived, we were ushered into a small sunday school classroom. Two ladies,(Team Leaders) met with us for our "family interview". They were very serious. This made me laugh. I couldn't help but notice how much one of the ladies had her hair styled exactly like June Carter Cash. But she wasn't at all happy like June.Not at all smiling like I've always seen June in pictures. An angry June Carter Cash. I tried to lighten things up,.. ya know, joke around a bit. Show a less serious side. They stared at me stone faced, and Austin shot me a look that said, "Give it up, mom, you're done."

After a few minutes of "What does your faith mean to you? " type questions, we were released to the main sanctuary. I was relieved to see that the kids all looked really normal and not at all wierd. Or serious. Or like June Carter Cash. Which was good.

During the presentation, I knew that I should be listening, but my mind was bringing up SO MANY funny things! As I looked around the sanctuary at the many oh-so-squidward-like- folks, it was as if every moment that I had ever found hysterical was suddenly poured into my mind anew. I had been seized by some sort of comedic demon.

I was thinking how Race NEVER has to attend any of these kinds of things. The last time he was around for any kind of ceremony was a Scout Court of Honor. Some of the kids were awarded a Tote 'n' Chip award, but Race, not being familiar with these things understood it to be a Tote'n Sh1t award!! BWAHAHAHA!!!

I kept thinking how many ladies were named "Mary" in the room we were sitting in.
There were a WHOLE lot of Marys there. Many Marys

I thought of Emily having to deal with the retarded lady at the beach all the time who says "Oh poop!" in answer to every request that cannot be granted.


And I couldn't help but snicker as my mind focused again on the presentation and I heard the safety rules read.There was a qualifier made about "drugs or alchohol", that this had never been an issue at the school. One lady grabbed her heart and said, "Oh thank God". Aww..

I faded again and I thought of my other sister Thomasina who is a photographer. And the time that she had been working all night taking pictures of this amazing UFC fighter, whom she thought was amazing. And then FINALLY when the night was winding down and she was off the clock, she asked someone else to take HER picture with this fighter..........only to get to her car and look at the picture and realize that her blouse had been open and part of her B**b was showing!! AND to make it even FUNNIER...the guy's signature pose was with one fist up, and kind of curled, so in effect, it looked like he was punching her in the b**b!! BWAHAHAHA!!!

That was it. I lost it. I was laughing. Irreverently and disrespectfully LAUGHING.

Why does this happen to me? It's like an episode of Seinfeld. I can't help it.

(Sigh)
* Could THIS be why I am shunned at homeschool gatherings???....COULD IT??*

After the presentation we met Austin's teacher who is a very sweet older man whom I really like. He seems very organized and very nice and his handshake is like holding a dead fish.

Oh well...it was kinda fun. Austin and I laughed alot on the way home. NIce folks I think, but EXTREMELY serious.

Oh. And I'm signed up to take over study hall 2 times a week. *snort*

Had to make a stop at the grocery store. On the way in I spotted a little old lady who walked all bent over, and had a little hump. I told Austin, "Look at that. I'm gonna be like that when I'm old. I just KNOW I'm gonna have a hump. ANd when I do, you guys be sure that I have a nice, pretty, little shawl or something to drape over it."
And he replied, "O.K. mom, and then we'll put a sign on you that say's "I'm a Little Hunchback".

I laughed till I cried. You can't teach stuff like that, my friends. You can't teach it.

Cheers!
Melissa

Gardening ....and my mom

Today I picked more green beans and tomoatoes from my garden. They have really out done themselves this year. It feels good to have a stocked freezer, and I am encouraged to try a fall garden this year.

Gardening always makes me think of my mom. She loves to garden and she is my go-to-garden-guru when I have questions. She taught me to love getting my hands dirty and "tending" the garden.

Tonight mom is sick. She was diagnosed with pneumonia and she is home in bed.

I don't think that I have shared with you that my parents had welcomed in a dear, dear, close, family friend ("Uncle Roy") who has been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer as well as leukemia.(I will save the awesome story of this incredible man for another night). They invited him to come and live with them and essentially, to die there, with them. They have cared for his needs in the most amazing way. And while no one is unaware of his prognosis and condition........this man is THRIVING. He is really thriving and really, really happy.

My parents are selfless people.

My mom is the most gifted caregiver that I have ever seen. EVER.
You see, she not only understands the physical comforts that the body needs, she has this amazing degree of respect and worth for humanity all on it's own. It just floors me. When you see this sort of caring, or if you are blessed enough to experience it, you sit back and wonder at it. It is so rare. A gentle love and respect of........LIFE. It's gift.

I do wonder at it all.
And most of all I am humbled beyond words that God would bless me with such powerful testimonies of His love. They have surrounded me my whole life.

Please say a prayer for my mom tonight.
Love you mom. Feel better!

They've got my back....

In going through my pictures, I found this video of my rapell.I had not heard the sound on this before. This is far from flattering.I actually look like a retard. A retard wearing a "Moosejaw" shirt. But I wanted you to see what I live with each day. My boys so lovingly took this for their mother. Note the concern in their voices. The funny comments about the rope breaking. oh, yes...that is funny. not.

Nothing is sacred.

Not even the guide.






WHERE do they get it???

Laugh WITH me dear readers...........WITH me.
Cheers!
Melissa

A little more catching up.....

With Race and me it's always the same: He drags me kicking and screaming to do some new, fun thing, and I protest the wole way that I can't do it, and then I get there, I do it, and I have a crazy good time, and can't wait to do it again. And then we just repeat that sequence over and over for each new adventure.

Rock climbing was no different.
We tossed sandwiches into the cooler and then everyone filled up their own camelbacks with water. We hit the road at 0' dark thirty and headed for the mountains. When we got there, we put on our shoes, harnesses, helmets, etc. and hiked to the bottom of the 100ft climb that we were about to make. When we got to the bottom, I took one look up the straight rock wall and immediately.... was about to pee my pants. I couldn't drag my body up that rock face!!! NO WAY! AAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!! Everything in me was screaming, "RUN AWAY! RUN AWAY!!" But then there stood Jack, Savannah, and Austin all UBER excited and just itching to get tied in and start trying to scramble up that rock face. ANd as always, there was Race. If he thought that I could do it.......then I had to at least TRY.

Long story-short: IT.WAS. AWESOME!!! climbing that first face, and reaching out with one shaky hand to slap the caribeener at the top was thrilling. My heart was pounding out of my chest. Not only did we get to do several different paths of top roping, but we went Rapelling as well. Rapelling is absolutely terrifying, until you get over that first ledge, and then you begin to just sit back, trust the rope, and lower yourself gently down that drop. ANd the view??? Breathtaking. THAT'S why people do this.










Here's me in the "Oh.My.Gosh. How can I get out of this"- phase. I was terrified. Savannah however, couldn't wait! Since Savannah, Jack and I had never been climbing before, Race had a guide meet us at the climb site.Savannah headed up without so much as a seconds hesitation. SHe is our Danger Girl.

Jackson scrambled up in lightening speed, and came down ready to go again. At this point, you're probably realizing that rock climbing photos are mostly butt shots, so...you know....sorry about that. But, hey man, we need to preserve this memory, people.SCARY!!!

Screaming inside, once again as I wait my turn to rapell.

But Just look at that VIEW!!!

The whole thing was amazing, and yes, I can't WAIT to go again!!!! Hurry home Race!!

Tagged!

Urban Mom tagged me the other day, and I am just now getting around to filling this out.


A. Attached or Single? Totally and Forever Wonderfully Attached! 18 years and going strong!

B. Best Moment? Almost 39 years and you want me to try to pick a moment?? This is not “the best” but I did have a pretty good one recently, I was going rock climbing for the first time and getting to the top and touching that carabineer! What a rush!

C. Cake or Pie? Cake. Chocolate, please.

D. Day of choice? Any day that I can spend with Race. They are far too few and we both covet them.
E. Essential item(s)? coffee in the a.m., bare essentials minerals, jeans, lip gloss, water bottle, Phyto hair products to keep my bleached blonde hair from breaking off, and this isn’t an item, but it is essential that I have at least 30 minutes to unwind by myself at the end of the day.
F. Favorite color?: Pink

G. Gummy bears or worms? neither, I prefer sour patch kids

H. Home town? in Virginia

I. Favorite indulgence(s)? Dinner and a cocktail with Race, expensive shoes and handbags

J. January or July? July

K. Kids? 16 year old boy, 14 year old girl and 11 year old boy who are all too old to be mine. They are without a doubt my greatest challenge and my greatest reward.

L. Life isn't complete without? Race. It’s as if God took my list “wants” for a husband and one-upped me by giving me the man I could have never dreamed existed.

M. Marriage date? July21, 1990 It was a HOT, HOT July day in the south. My bridesmaids were threatened with guns to wear perfectly pink billowy taffetta dresses, and the church was lined with giant pink bows. The carriage ride from the church to my parents house for the outdoor reception was………HOT. And I loved every minute of it.

N. Number of brothers and sisters? Two sisters, no brothers. Grew up on a farm. Learned to throw hay bales and drive trucks and tractors early on in life. Boyfriends came in handy later for that sort of thing.

P. Phobias? Being over or under dressed.

Q. Quotes: Oh, I can’t think of even ONE right now, and this is taking too long. I have CHEMISTRY to do, still!

R. Reasons to smile? Because I have a web cam and I got to see Race today. This is the first time that he’s been away that we were able to do that. I could see his face, read his expressions, and just know how much we missed each other. We could just sit and stare with these goofy expressions. Too funny.

S. Season of choice? Spring or fall


U. Unknown Fact about me? Not Unknown but little known: I have a tatoo. It is on my left , inside heel and it is the Christian fish symbol.

V. Vegetable? Love em‘ all as long as they are fresh, but I think that the ones that I grow myself taste the best!!.

W. Worst habit? absent mindedly laying my sunglasses down and forgetting where they are.

X. X-ray or ultrasound? ultrasound??? What the hell kind of question is that??

Y. Your favorite food? Anything well prepared, with many flavors. I was raised to LOVE good food, and I do!

Z. Zodiac sign? Virgo.

If you decide to do this one, please comment back, so that I can go and check out your answers!!

Jackson's 11th Birthday!!

Summer winding down..........

Well, I have a plan!! School officially starts tomorrow. I have an 11th grader, a 9th grader and a 6th grader. I am ready. I can do this.

Right?

I'll check back in tomorrow night. (I can't believe they let me do this)

After church today My Son Who Is Driving took himself and Jackson back into town to a friends house. Before they left they loaded the suburban down with all manner of nerf guns (modified, of course) and nerf ammo. Some of the things that I saw used to make these "special modifications" were wax, old toilet paper tubes, markers with the insides removed, and, of course...duct tape...LOTS of duct tape. There was apparently an all out war at the friends house, complete with a homemade smoke bomb used for cover. (Jackson demonstrated the smoke bomb: a ping pong ball wrapped in aluminum foil, and lit with a match. It smokes like the real thing. huh..who knew?)

Don't these kids have parents?? (Oh- crap-never mind. That's me)

Savannah and I stayed here and enjoyed the wonderful quietness of the house and the nice breeze outside. Far, far away from the 7 boys and their Nerf Wars.

So, that's how the day went.

But now, I thought that i'd catch up a bit on the happenings of the summer.

Let's see...........first of all Race was home! We had such an amazing time, and it makes me tear up a little to think that he will be so far away for so long. I miss him so much, and we're just getting started.

*shaking it off*

Race was home to see Savannah's performance in Encore' this year. 7 hours per day, for 5 days a week, for 4 solid weeks . She loves every second of it. This year's production was HONK, JR. !

What fun! As always it was just amazing. We were thoroughly entertained, as we laughed and smiled our way through the performance. 3 sold out shows! Here are a few pictures of Savannah and some of her compadre's from the cast.

Oh yeah, and Jackson turned 11! Can you believe it? My baby is 11 years old. (I know, I know *blush* How do I do it?) He got his very own kayak!! Here he is checking out the specs. But more about his party and all that later. I'm getting ahead of myself here.


Remember staring at my post about Austin getting his Black Belt for like...I don't know... 2 months??? Well, Jackson earned a JR. Black Belt at about the same time. Same grueling character requirements, and the physical test is modified for the younger age and skill level. SO, here are a few pics of Jack during his testing.

Yeah............you don't wanna mess with Johnny Bad Asses Ninos, KWIM? With their Nerf skills and martial arts combined these dudes mean business. *Smile*

O.k, O.k, this is taking way too much time. I think I'll try a slide show tomorrow. Assuming I am not sitting on the floor in the corner sucking on my own hair and babbling like an idiot after a full day of school.

so ya know...we'll see.

Cheers!

Melissa

Testing.....Testing......1,2..

Race is gone and I am trying to get reacclimated to flying solo again.

My new, beautiful niece has arrived and we've been to see her!

My son is driving on his own.

We are in the middle of a major remodel on Savannah's room.

School starts Monday, and I should probably have some sort of plan or something.

My son is driving on his own.

The green beans MUST be picked, blanched and put in the freezer TODAY.

In short, I am within a day or two of dusting off the ole' blog and posting regularly again. I miss it. But the darned kids keep doing stuff that require pictures. It slows me down ,man. I dunno, maybe one big slide show or something? ANd did I mention that my son is driving on his own?? It is freaking me out. I am my mother. Who knew?

Think of me today while I am ripping out carpet and picking beans! I'll be back!
Cheers!
Melissa

Modesty, Courtesy, Integrity, Perseverance, Self- control

*I have some catching up to do, so I'll start with the oldest and work my way down the line.*


The Tenets of the Black Belt: Modesty, Courtesy, Integrity, Perseverance, Self Control

Do you remember when I told you about Austin and Jackson starting the Ultimate Black Belt Test?? The gruelling months that were ahead for them in keeping up with the requirements for reaching a black belt in Mixed Martial Arts? remember all that? Well....it's time for an update.

A few of the requirements that Austin had to fulfill over the past 8 months were:

Preform and record 1000 acts of random kindness
Execute and record 100 push ups and 100 sit ups every day
Journal about your training
Walk/run 1000 miles (Not a typo....1000)

And a whole bunch of goal setting, personal victories, etc..

He finished it, and it ended up making a nice, thick, three ring binder full of accomplishments.

But that was not the end of the test........oh noooooo.......that was just the BEGINNING! Then he had to show his skills to finish up the UBBT and try to earn his black belt.

Austin had to fight 50 rounds, with fresh opponents switching in and out every 3 minutes. Yes....50. As in 5 tens...as in the number of cents in 1/2 a dollar.......as in the number of states in the good ole' US of A. 50!!!!! (she screamed)

Using the skills that he has aquired over the past 6 years in sparring, Jiu Jitsu, muai Tai etc, I watched this kid go 50 rounds . I watched him push himself harder than he ever imagined possible. I watched as he became so exhausted that he could no longer "think" through his moves, but his training just took over and he just "knew" what to do.

I watched him get knocked out,(yes...knoocked out) come to, get some water, and then tell his coach, "No coach, I can finish".

Then he went 7 more rounds to finish. His coach walked over to me and said" That belt's gonna fit when I put it on him." For a mother this was almost too much to take. But for Austin, this was his goal. It's what he set out to do, and he intended to finish it. And he did. And I was there to watch.

At 16, he has earned his black belt in MMA. This is the youngest age at which one can achieve this goal, and in fact, this school has only ever awarded 2 others in it's history.

Austin, we could not be more proud of you. You have proven that you possess the character and the skills of a black belt, and we knew that you could do it. Truly amazing accomplishment.

Congratulations Austin! We love you!!
Cheers!

Melissa

The weekend

We got a lot done over the weekend.

It seems a deer had decided to make itself at home in my garden. Grrrr... Now, we live out in the sticks, so this is still a "country deer" and not one of those crazy "city deer" that has become so tame that it tips over garbage cans and stuff. *shudder* No, this deer had just realized that there were some tasty rows of green beans at the edge of a clearing in the woods. The deer had also realized that the 2 chocolate labs "guarding" the property, were really just too lazy most of the time to be bothered.

Unfortunately by Friday, he had wiped out all my green bean plants. They had already begun to flower.
*Insert much swearing and stomping and loud declarations of freezers full of venison, here*

So. Jackson and I replanted the green beans, and then Austin and I put up fencing around the garden. I then followed that up with the Deer Scram spray "fencing" stuff. Yeah........ummmm......ever used that stuff???? I don't know how well it works on deer, but I can attest to how well it works on CHILDREN. The kids were in the pool when I started spraying it out of the bottle, and within seconds they were gagging, covering their mouths and grabbing their towels to run indoors. Wow. But who can blame them? Do you know what that stuff is made of?? Rotten eggs..........and Garlic. MMmmmmmmmmm..............

Anyway, after replanting and fencing, hopefully we are "country deer" proof.

I planted the rest of the tomato plants and cucumbers and used the grass clippings left after the boys mowed the lawn, to mulch everything.

We have also begun to remodel Savannah's room. We smashed a wall out weeks ago, (I have nothing, if not a demolition crew) and now we've have been removing wallpaper. Ugh. This week I've made a deal w/ the kids that if we can get it all the way to primed-ready-to-paint stage, I'll take them to see one of the new movies out that they've been DYING to see. It's a lofty goal, but they are pretty good workers when they want to be.

And speaking of working, Austin is at Mam-maw and Pap-paws house trying to help them get some things done around their house. They have a big Par-Tay coming up next weekend, so he was sent up there to help out. I was told that they had steak dinners last night. Poor kid.

We hauled off a Sanford and Son load of garbage in the
Scalded Dog, got my flower beds weeded AND my closet re-organized.

So, you see, some people work in a steadt stream of small bursts of energy, while mine just seems to burst all at one time.

Happy Fathers Day!
Cheers!
Melissa

The shoes...

The shoes. The kids and I got to go and meet Race for a few days while he continues through more weeks of Johnny Bad-DER Ass Training. I slaved away by the wave pool at Water Country, while the kids took on every wild water ride in sight. That night, the kids were exhausted and only too happy to stay in their hotel room pigging out on pizza and playing X Box 360 till they couldn't hold open their weary eyes. SOoo....when Race came back from lounging around at Johnny Bad-DER Ass Training, we met some of the guys he works with, for dinner. I wore the shoes. I wore them with white cuffed dress shorts and an awesome black swing top, that ties halter style behind the neck. I concentrated very hard on walking in micro steps, because that is the only way a gal can look remotely normal in 4 inch heels.





*At this moment I would like to thank my private school and Christian college upbringing for making my life a living hell all those years by forcing me to wear dresses EVERY DAY. Sadly, one of the most valuable skills I took from those years was, you guessed it.....learning to walk in heels. So, Thank-you, my education was not in vain. *





And you know what? As soon as I stepped into the resteurant, the cute hostess gal, exclaimed,"OH MY GOSH! I LOVE your shoes! Where did you get those?"


I swear it. It's true. You can ask Race. And the night just got better from there. We had an awesome time. Great company, great food. We ate too much, drank too much and laughed way too much.





And when I got home....

THESE were on my porch. I could not love them more. You must buy these. You MUST. The back even ZIPS, so that you don't have to fasten all those little buckles every time. If I could buy you all a pair, I would. I love them THAT much. AND no training required to walk in them!! I am deeply indebted to all gladiators for inspiring this sandal.

And now that I've gotten that out of my system, I swear I won't post about shoes ANY More.

Cheers!

Melissa

A bit of a mixed bag here....

Check it out! I grow stuff!

I cut all the broccoli except for a few smallish heads, got it blanched and put up in the freezer.


It amounted to 4, 1 gallon ziploc bags full. I reserved the stalks for cream of broccoli soup for the fall.( You know,... that chilly time of year when the air itself doesn't suffocate you?...I have the faintest memory...) And I gave some to my sister, Thom.

The fresh broccoli is of course delicious, and the first thing that strikes you is how unbeleivably BRIGHT GREEN it is when you steam it. The plan is to leave the plants in the garden a bit longer to let them finish spitting out all those tiny little heads, and then pull them up and plant more beans in that space.


Switching gears, fast...........

The shoe gods have smiled on me. Look what I found yesterday:


You KNOW I had to get them when as I was trying them on in the store and admiring them in the mirror, and my 10 yr old boy walks up and says with great enthusiasm, "Oh my gosh mom. You HAVE to get those.They look SO good on you!" (He followed that up by showing me the Smithsonian gem kit that was on sale for $5. I could not love TJ Maxx more.)
I got the shoes. He got the kit. Sweet.

So, what would you wear these with? I am thinking about a pair of white, straight shorts that come down to the knee. You know, the city-fit style. What do you think?

Race will be home for the weekend and I am super-excited about that. So after lessons today, we are going to run around and try to make the house look like we don't actually live in squallor the whole time he's gone. ;-)

Here's to a great weekend, ahead!
Cheers! (*clink*)
Melissa

What's that smell?

That was the first thought that blasted into my head when I walked into the kitchen yesterday morning and opened the refridgerator door for the coffee creamer. Moments later, as I reached in to remove the offending food, I accidently raked out the entire basket of eggs. And they fell. And they all broke. All 13 of them. On my running shoe.Which I was wearing.

* Please take a moment to reflect here that this was all BEFORE the first cup of coffee*

So there I stood. In my running shorts and multiple running bras(don't ask) and tank, hair hastily pulled back, running hat squashed on my head, with a long forgotten smelly piece of food in my left hand, and a dozen+ eggs oozing all over my right foot.

THAT was how the day began.

The day ended up being full of challenges and at one point that evening I found myself trapped in the dugout with 2 very large baseball coaches and 12, 10 yr old boys while the torrential rains blew in on us. This in and of itself wouldn't have been so bad, but one of the coaches decided to corner me and recount all of his latest parenting horror stories, in dealing with his eight year old. "DO YOU KNOW WHAT HE SAID TO ME THE OTHER DAY?!" This gargatuan man must speak to you very loudly and all within an INCH of your face. Gah!! What could I possibly give you NOT to tell me....and to please respect my personal space a wee bit more?*shrug* I like hin though-good coach. ;-)

But the day wasn't all bad. That morning, I ended up wiping off my shoe and going for my run anyway. :-) ( ANd just FYI...egg yolk actually will seep through your shoe and into your sock....How sick is that??) After the baseball game was rained out, Race called and said that he was going to be able to make it home for the night! (excited squeal!) SO after picking up one kid from MMA, I dropped by the Outback and picked up salads, ribs and veggies and headed home. I got to spend an unexpected, relaxing dinner with Race and the kids. (Yes!)
After dinner, we all watched the Alaska Experiment ( HONESTLY, If I am ever stranded ANYWHERE with that Wise family, just shoot me), and we ended the night with a couple of rounds of submission Jiu Jitsu between Race and Jackson. (Yikes! the kid's getting good!)

So, here's to turning the day around!!
Cheers!
Melissa

Home School Post

*Non-homeschoolers, feel free to talk amongst yourselves, here. * ;-)


For the last several weeks I’ve been trying to get us back on track. I haven’t been happy with the way that school and our life in general has been going for the last several months. It felt like I just “lost it” somewhere along the way and just never could get everything back within my slippery grasp again. I guess with Race being “home” (he isn’t really, but at least he is in the states right now, and the bullets flying at him are only fake ones) I began to realize how uptight I get when he is away. I don’t even see it in myself when it’s happening, but I guess the combination of underlying concern that I have for Race along with the constant running pace to keep on top of things here makes me a little…….TENSE.
So, for the past few months, I’ve been slowly relaxing my grip on the wheel, slowing down and gazing around at the scenery a bit. And I haven’t been liking what I’ve been seeing.

In short: High school has been kicking my butt.

School for the older 2 had become little more than a checklist of textbook assignments. And while I love the different curricula that we are using, we just weren’t making the most of it. The love of learning was gone. The interest, the curiosity………….gone.
Jackson had become undisciplined in his academics and was routinely bored and looking for an escape route. The kids still had all of their activities, and I was usually completely frazzled and tired at the end of each day. To top it all off the household chores were all left to me and I had allowed this to be the case.

This is not what home schooling should look like.

So, while Race is “home”, I took a breather and decided to reanalyze my strategy and then regroup my army.

I took a look again at the method of home schooling that drew me in to this crazy world of home schooling to begin with:Charlotte Mason . I began reading her books again, only this time, Book Six (kind of the high school age) really caught my interest.
I really BELIEVE in this method. It really resonates with me. And if Charlotte Mason were alive, and living in VA, you can bet my 3 kids would be attending her school!

But alas, she isn’t and she doesn’t and so, the kids…aren’t. So I started to scan the internet. But as I joined email groups and perused message boards, I was left feeling that most of those using this method for high school had settled for something much less than what I believe Ms. Mason would have recognized as a whole education.

SO I pulled out my tried and true “go-to” book for home schooling The Well Trained Mind. I love the classical method as it is presented here. But , alas, I am no academic. And while I loved, Loved, LOVED this when the kids were younger, I was really struggling trying to accomplish this in our home with grades 10,8,and 5 all at once. I was just falling woefully short.
But the more I studied, the more I realized that these 2 methods actually dovetail beautifully together. They are , in fact very similar in many ways. They are both meant to educate the “whole” child and to encourage the child to learn to focus so that he/she becomes disciplined to learn for themselves. And as an EFFECT……… learning itself, becomes enjoyable. Learning becomes a task worthy of one’s time and effort.

SO I set about to make a master schedule. Perhaps re-inventing the wheel at times, but, hey- my family needed a little different wheel!

My curricula and my end goals ….my SPINE comes from TWTM, but many of my methods are now drawn from Charlotte Masons work, along with getting back to Journaling, Shakespeare, art and music study. And you know what???
IT’S WORKING!!!!!!!!!!

The older kids have their schedules for the week. On Sundays I make out their lists. Every subject , along with the chapters to be completed, any assignments, and written work. And for the most part they regulate their own work each day. On Fridays, we discuss the readings for the week and all written assignments. This is where the Socratic dialogue comes into play as well. ;-) Discuss, discuss, discuss. This is my favorite day of the week with the older two. This has really given them a renewed focus.
With the older two knowing what to do and staying on task, I am freed me up to work with Jackson. We have our list too. Jackson is dyslexic, so there is still a considerable amount of reading that he cannot do on his own. But he is working above grade level in almost every other subject, so we don’t let this hold us back.

It’s really been going great and I have seen such a renewed interest in each of the kids. Their own ideas are flowing forth from them again and they are EXCITED about learning.
Now, the REAL key to this new system is what we will call……. The Daily list. I will try to explain this a little bit better.
To keep everyone on task, they each have an additional list in their notebooks. And before anyone has free time, all the things on the list must be completed.

The Daily list looks like this:

Shower
Make bed
Room picked up and laundry put into place
School finished for the day
School books put away
Choose 1 chore from the kitchen list , complete it and cross it off
And:
Austin: Dirty dishes in dishwasher
Savannah: put away clean dishes.
Jackson: take out kitchen trash

The kitchen list referred to above is a list of things that I would like to have done each week. Things like cleaning their bathrooms, cleaning out the car, doing their laundry, etc. I printed it out and placed it in a page protector . It is posted on the kitchen with a marker. Each day they pick one, do it, cross it off and initial it.

This has been working really well. I think the beauty of it is that it places the responsibility back to the children, and helps everyone see a clear-cut goal each day. It also helps each person to be able to look back on the day and realize all that has been accomplished. Of course some have taken to the list faster than others, but I have found that with constant encouragement, each of them is “getting it”. The kicker is, that without exception, the Daily list MUST BE DONE before anything else can take place. That means baseball, martial arts, running around outside…….whatever. And if for some reason the older 2 don’t have their work ready on Friday then that means you have to work through the weekend until it’s finished. Not to be seen as a punishment at all, just a direct consequence of taking your free time during the week.


So. We’ve turned a corner here, and it actually feels really good. I’m thinking that we may not screw them up completely after all, and maybe……………….just MAYBE………..we might make this whole thing work!

At the ball game..........

Bases loaded. Jack is up to bat.

The kids are in the dug-out chanting, "Jack-SON!!!, Jack-SON!!!, Jack-SON!!!!!"

And then the pitch....... fast ball.........right down the middle.

*CRACK!* There it goes!!!!!!!!!!

GRAND SLAM HOME RUN!!!!

Congratulations Jackson!
Wish that Race could have seen it. It was awesome.

I don't need to remind my readers that Jack has been in that situation before when it didn't turn out the same way.

When he ran across home plate and made it back into the dugout I thought that his teammates were going to kill him in their excitement. And when his big brother and big sister came over and congratulated him with that fist-to-fist thing that all cool big kids do.......well..........the team was awe-struck. (*whisper,wisper*....woah.the BIG kids) It was a great night. This is only the 2nd game we've won this season.

I love the game of baseball.

Cheers!
Melissa

P.s.- Homeschool posts coming soon! (*snort!* What??? Did ya think we weren't educatin' the lil' sluggards anymore??)